You know, I was just going to skip on posting anything about Father’s Day. Because to be honest, I have been a little bitter about the whole father situation. To start off, we buried my dad on a Wednesday and then just 4 days later I had to watch Nathan celebrate his dad being home.
It was a moment that was a lot more bitter than sweet. It just didn’t seem fair. Not that I wasn’t very happy to have Nathan’s dad home, it is just that it was like a punch in the gut that I would not get to experience a time like that with my dad until after this life is over and done with.
And then to add insult to injury I was expected to celebrate Father’s Day just a few weeks later. The week before Father’s Day we planted a couple of gardenia bushes given to us by Nathan’s mom and by our sweet home teacher and his wife to serve as symbolic reminders of my dad.
That too made me a little sad that instead of getting to see my dad I was planting a bush to help me remember him. Like I said, I’ve been a little bitter. But surprisingly, yesterday was better than I expected. Rather than being a normal church service, we had Stake Conference. The focus of the conference was family. As I arrived there yesterday morning, I almost began crying before the opening song was even sung. And so I said a little prayer. Just asking to help me get through the day. But Heavenly Father did better than that. He helped me not only get through the day but to find joy in it. The speakers were uplifting and inspiring and filled my heart with hope of great things to come. But most of all as I watched Nathan with Mandy and Dallin as they gave him their special Coupon Books they had made, I was filled with gratitude knowing what a wonderful father my children have been blessed with. Then as we spent the evening with Nathan’s family, my heart was again filled with gratitude knowing what a wonderful father my husband has and how grateful I am that I can count him as my father too.
I know I will likely still have lots of moments of sadness when thinking of my dad, but I am so grateful for the gospel and knowing that our family is a Forever Family.